so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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