names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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