Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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