Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize
