...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
They are going to name an STD after you.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
