I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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