Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Randomize
