This girl is more easily done than said...
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Randomize
