i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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