so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
