Pregnant stripper...not hot.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Randomize