And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Randomize
