I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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