he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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