I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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