Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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