What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Randomize
