A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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