some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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