Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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