So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
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