she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I am naked and annoyed.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?