You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
Randomize
