what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Randomize
