people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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