Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
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