So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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