I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
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