It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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