Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Randomize
