I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
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