Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
