your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
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