I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
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