It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Randomize
