a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
the raccoons are back...
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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