I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
