you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
