I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
the majority of my texts from you are at 3 AM & consist of either "I'm drunk", "you're asian", or "bratwurst"
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Randomize
