It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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