You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
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