Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
