i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
