So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
