im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
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