so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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