yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
