The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
For the record, saying you're friends with the owner doesn't work when the owner is the one throwing you out.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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