In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
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