does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I enjoy the company of your penis
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
