I can't breathe out the right side of my face
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
ok first of all what the fuck
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
